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Your Situation: Always Structural – Never Personal

We are used to thinking situational and fixing problems. And to take things personally. We are usually not trained in the fact that situations emerge out of patterns, which are a function of the underlying structure. And problems result out of structural conflicts. If we deal with situations or problems, we miss the opportunity to create lasting change. Because we are just looking at the symptoms, not the cause.

What is a structure?

Everything is a structure. A car, a stone, a rocking chair, a tire. And every structure has certain implications. It is simply the connection between 2 (or more) points.

Think of travelling:

  1. The first point is your current location. Where you are right now.
  2. The second point is your destination. Where you want to go.

These 2 points form a structure. Once they are defined, you can select the best travel medium. E.g. train, car, airplane. And then travel from where you are right now towards your destination. If any of those 2 points is missing, your travel becomes ‘chaotic’ 🙂 And you probably wont arrive, where you planned to go.

With the example of travelling this is quite obvious. However, we mostly don’t transfer that obviousness to our lives. But our life is a journey as well: From where we are right now to where we want to go. We are always in a structure. That leads to 2 possibilities:

  1. We can become aware of our structure and chose it consciously.
  2. We just live life reacting to the default structure we are in.

Why does structure matter?

Because each on of us is always moving towards somewhere or something. No matter if you chose that destination consciously or not. Our vehicle of experience – our identity – is a structure. Reality is polar.

And each structure creates tension. And that tension seeks resolution towards equilibrium. Because within a structure that is the path of least resistance.

Path of least resistance

Think of water raining on the mountaintop, finding its way down till it reaches the sea. Water finds it way between these 2 points, mountaintop and sea, according to the principle of the past of least resistance. As water, also energy always follows the path of least resistance.

Everything ever created and manifested is the result of tension seeking resolution.

It’s like a stretched rubber band under tension. Once you release one side it pulls you towards your equilibrium.

3 types of structure

The different structural patterns can play out over time different time horizons ranging from minutes to several years. You might not yet be aware of the structure you are in, because it is difficult to see it from within. Therefore an initial openness is required to recognize the structure one is in.


That principle works wonderful if we are in structure where we are travelling towards what we truly love and are. Life becomes magnificent, synchronicities happen, we can appreciate the wonder of life. We are in a flowing structure. We are living in touch with reality. We are not stuck in our current perception but let us be pulled towards our true destination – our new equilibrium.

This is the creative orientation. And what my offering is all about – yeah 😀


It’s quite not that wonderful if we are in a stuck structure. Nothing moves. It’s an experience of stagnation. We are living in our shadow identified with our negative concepts about us, others and the world. As the stone we seem to have no inherent capacity to move anywhere.


This is probably the most common life experience. We are moving towards something to then face resistance (fear, doubt). The closer we come to our goal, the higher the resistance. We might reach that goal eventually, to then be pulled backwards to where we were before. And loose what we had achieved. As the rocking chair our life experience becomes an oscillating movement between to sides: Stagnation (stuck) and Momentum (flowing).

This is the reactive response orientation.

All 3 structures exist in each individuals consciousness. Everybody has the inherent capacity for a flowing life experience. It's structural. Not personal. It really comes down to choosing ones structure consciously. It is the free choice we have.

You might think: Ok, interesting but what to do about it? How can I chose a flowing structure?

Let’s first look at what prevents us from having it!

Structural Conflict

There are 3 reasons for not having a flowing life experience.

1. no interest in changE

That’s pretty straight forward. No desire, interest or awareness to chose or change. That’s probably not you, as then you wouldn’t be reading this article 😉

2. going for a negative vision

Your destination (goal) is motivated by going away from something. Not for its own sake. But to avoid or compensate lack or fear. You are reactive to outside circumstances. That’s what is most prevalent in our society, we are trained and conditioned to live our life by the dictate of circumstances. E.g.

  • I’m poor: I must be rich
  • I’m fat: I must be thin
  • I’m unworthy: I must be worthy
  • I’m stupid: I must be smart
  • I’m not loved: I must be loved
  • And so on.

Our goal becomes to compensate for a perceived lack – our perception of us, others or the world. So technically we are remaining in the same current location as that underlying lack does not magically stop by itself. We might be able to change our circumstances or achieve goals, but the underlying perception remains the same. What we resist persists.

Result: Equilibrium is current reality. We stay where we are. The rubber band get’s pulled back to Current Reality.

3. Having conflicting goals

We have a positive vision, a goal which is purely motivated by itself. Out of love. We realize we don’t need to have, change, create anything. And from that true perspective we chose what we would love to be, have and create. For its own sake. And without any guarantee of actually achieving it.

However at the same time, we have a perception, concepts, ideals, beliefs that are contradicting that vision. E.g. we belief that it wont be safe to go for our positive vision, so we must build safety first. That we are not capable yet, not good enough, not worthy, powerless yet, so we have first to fix that perceived lack of us. And that pursuit becomes a conflicting goal.

Consequence: We are pulled between these 2 poles. The more we work towards our positive vision, the higher the resistance of our beliefs and concepts. So that we get pulled back and start to compensate for our beliefs and concepts, our conflicting goal. To then start working towards our positive vision again. And so on.

Illustration: Imagine you unconsciously believe you cannot trust women. For example, as a result of a childhood experience. Now you are in a relationship that you really want. Your positive vision. But you start to sabotage it, because you can’t trust women. For example, by constantly testing your partner to see if she can really be trusted. This becomes your conflicting goal. Or from the beginning you choose a partner who is really not to be trusted. Sooner or later this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and you sabotage your positive vision of a fulfilling relationship.

Result: No equilibrium and oscillation. We are pulled back and forth between the 2 poles.

Solution: True positive Vision

1. Chose Your true Vision

You simply chose what you love to create. For its own sake. Independent of if you make money, create followers, be loved etc. You probably will make some good money from what you create, but the creation is not conditional on it.

2. Observe your current reality

You establish where you are in relation to that vision. Your current reality = your physical and psychological situation. That includes recognising your shadow on the one side – your beliefs, fear, doubt, compensating tendencies – but on the other side also your Genius – your intuitive insights, inherent creative capacity, gifts and opportunities.

If you do that right, you neutralize conflicting goals and compensating tendencies. And establish a Structural Tension between your Current Reality and your true Vision.

3. Take action

Apply your focus by chosing you vision. And then take the obvious next action step towards it.

It does absolutely not matter what you believe, is possible, how you feel about yourself or what is backed up by your experience. As said before its structural, not personal. Once you apply above and change your focus, your life experience will change beyond perception.

Result: You get pulled towards your new equilibrium. Your true vision.


The amazing byproduct of the creative process is, that you not only stop taking things personal but you also stop solving problems. Instead, you are creating something anew. And embody who you are. Beyond beliefs or concepts.

In essence what I am describing here is very simple and straight forward. Though it might take some training to establish that understanding of simplicity. That is what my offering and training curriculum Structural Creativity is all about.

To empower you to Be As You Are and Create What You Love! ❤️

If that’s something that excites you and you wanna explore how I can support you – let’s connect!

Let’s schedule a free 30 min ‘Discovery Call’ today!